The Power You Have Over Me

Dear Isabelle,

The first time we met was nothing short of a fairy-tale, though I wasn't in a pretty gown and the one I sought wasn't looking for the girl who wore the glass slipper.

The first time our eyes met, I saw an ocean filled with vivid emotions which were concealed and not to be read. I noticed your eyes, seeing what you saw; how you were lonely sometimes, and afraid, but always brave; the way you saw the world, its colors, textures and sounds. I felt the way you felt, thought, hoped, and dreamt. I felt as if I was dreaming and thinking and feeling with you. I dreamed what you dreamed, wanted what you wanted and then I realized that I just wanted you.

My heart knew that you could be a safe haven but my mind was clouded by the thoughts of the past and considered your affection a trap.

Somebody was right when they said that it's the hope of one’s mind that crushes their heart into pieces. Maybe that's why I never asked you. I hoped that maybe you too would feel the same butterflies, but reality knocked on the door and asked me “Who could love a monster, a person who couldn’t even feel, someone who had forcefully turned herself numb to emotions?”

I could not tell you if I loved you the first moment I saw you, or if it was the second or the third or the fourth, but I remember the first moment I looked at you and realized that somehow the rest of the world seemed to vanish when I was with you. Colpo di fulmine. The thunderbolt, as the Italians call it.

When love strikes someone like lightning, so powerful and intense it can't be denied, it’s beautiful and messy, like they’re cracking their chest open and spilling their soul out for the world to see. It turns a person inside out, and there's no going back. Once the thunderbolt hits, your life is irreversibly changed.

You were my thunderbolt and I was a coward, never too brave to try on the glass slipper.

Yours, Madelaine.

Author: Anubhi Srivastava

Editor: Srushti Saware

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